Task 2d Inquiry

What in your daily practice gets you really enthusiastic to find out more about?

I just want it all.

I want to know what to do and how to do it. I have recently been taking on more responsibility at work being in charge of an evening and running the night and I am so eager to be perfect (which is actually one of my biggest faults). 

When I see videos of great performances I can't help but just admire, pick them apart, see what moves they are doing. It excites me how good they can be. 

Who do you admire who also works with what makes you enthusiastic?

Having trained at a dance college and know how hard those 3 years are, I admire everyone that manages to complete their training. It's hard, it's not always fun. It takes a lot of hard work and determination.

I admire those individuals I see time and time again at auditions. It's so hard to continue to pick yourself up after rejection, after rejection, after rejection. It also makes me laugh that I see the same people at auditions, If I see the same people, who the hell is getting all the jobs?

What gets you angry or makes you sad?

Unprofessionalism.

It drives me crazy that I give my all and other people around me don't give half as much.

"when are you going to get a real job?''

This has got to be the most aggravating question that I receive on a daily basis, because obviously dancing isn't a 'real job'. Instantly my blood starts to boil and I try to give the whitest response back making it clear that they have annoyed me. 

Minimum Wage

I took out a bank loan which I have another 2 and a half years of paying off and my parents gave me as much as they could just to put me through dance college. I spent 3 years giving blood, sweat and tears to be where I am today, I give my all and always want to my best. To be given minimum hours and minimum pay.

Who do you admire who shares your feelings or has found a way to work around the anger/sadness?

I am lucky to have a close network of friends and a supportive family. So if I need to talk to someone and relieve some stress they would be my first port of call. 

I have members of my team that I can speak and rant to and more often than not we are feeling the same way. We now choose to look at it and ask ourselves the question: does this really effect your life? No? Then forget it! It's also important to remember not everyone can do the same things your strengths are someone else weakness and vice versa. 

What do you love about what you do?

I love that I can make myself happy and when I perform I make the audience happy. Nothing will beat that thrill of going out onto the stage and giving it my all.

The cliental I mainly perform for are generally the older generation, now they can be extremely rude or extremely lovely. Never have I had so many compliments about our team shows and how amazing we are! In this industry you do NOT get feedback, It's not very often you get told you're doing well. However working at Norton Grange these guests have mad my confidence improve dramatically. It's great!

Who do you admire who also seems to love this or is an example of what you love?

I work in a team of 7 plus my manager and a resident band. It is an amazing feeling be surrounded by so many talented people who have that will and want to perform.

What do you feel you don't understand?

Why people are so quick to judge and why do they care so much?

Their mothers should have taught them, 'if you haven't got anything nice to say don't say anything'.

In this industry people are so quick to judge, whether they be a performer them self or part of an audience. You are surrounded by a lot of negativity for no reason except people always have an opinion. You can't let yourself be bothered by the negativity but deep down it effects you.

Who do you admire who does seem to understand it or who has found a way of making not understanding it interesting or beautiful or has asked the same questions as you?

As a team we are usually there for each other when they need that bit of extra support.

The Secret

The Secret is a powerful book. It helps with overall positivity and finding your in connections to help yourself succeed. It's a great read when you just need that little bit of reassurance. 

http://www.thesecret.tv

I find that I can motivate myself a lot easier by getting up earlier, being proactive, I am a big lover of writing a list and ticking things off one by one, being tidy, being aware of what I need to do on a daily basis. Organised and prepared are two words that I would usually us to describe myself, however throughout this first module I couldn't have been any less organised but day by day I am slowly getting on top of everything. And its by not being the things mentioned above that upset me, get me stressed easily and effect my work ethic.
This course has helped me with my day to day life already. I have started to relate this reflective practice to what I have done, to what I'm currently doing. It's so easily done and I'm starting to realise I'm reflecting without fully realising and understanding that I'm doing it. I have to reflect if I am going to improve and move on with my career.
These questions that I have had to ask myself, make me question my career and normal life in a positive way. It makes me think and be pro active with my thoughts and actions.